Lately I don’t go to sleep, I collapse … wake up with the light still on and a book on my chest.
I’m not an Atheist, I am an Agnostic, however I do believe in karma, the power of the community (group) to do both good and bad, miracles and that our planet, our Mother Nature is very much alive and as a person her moods change … almost in a literal way with the wind.
The better we treat her … the better she will treat us.
Another Miracle? … I don’t know if I deserve one, but I want one.
I am so blessed by the miracle that I have returned to TV … early in my career never would I have guessed that the place I would be so ‘wanted’ would be Pennsylvania. I’m now on my 5th station in PA. I have come to slowly love the state, the hundreds of cities, townships and boroughs and of course our viewers.
Second only to Florida, Pennsylvania has the oldest average age in the USA so I still have a chance … at least for a few more years. (I am no longer young and beautiful enough for places like Miami) Some of my photogs are young enough to be my kids … they teach me ‘new tech’ and I teach them ‘old school’.
Friday, at last warm enough for my fingers to actually feel the microphone, having the lights on and the sat truck sending the shot to Galaxy 16 from historic Chambersburg, PA; I took a second to feel blessed. That somehow out of oblivion, at one point even being homeless and living in my car, the karma of life (God?) had brought me back.
You don’t know how good something can feel until you know it is gone forever and then, almost like magic, it is back.
I have been a victim, but I have also been a victim of my own, OK I’ll say it … stupidity.
This morning as I awoke with the light still on, the winter sun streaming through the blinds and the February wind howling … the jet is interacting with the surface wind and today we are getting just a tiny taste of how strong the jet stream can be!
The dream was so vivid and real and then … just a dream.
Her name is Andra … and she transcended life, she was magic in motion, as close to Mother Earth as any person I have ever known and yet as aggressive, tough and fragile as the tigers she loves and cared for with such passion. (For more, wait for my book, ‘Tangled Wires’ … hopefully it’ll be done while I am still of this earth?)
More than ten years ago due to my own ego, pride and yes, stupidity, I let her slip away. The fault was mine, yet somehow in the wind this morning I could almost feel her presence … only a dream of the wind.
I knew TV was gone forever … I know that Andra is gone forever.