Is God’s Name Garfield?

18 02 2008

Saturday while out doing an errand on my bicycle, I was pleased — and surprised — to see God again.

God was this time was walking south on Mason Street with his home made cross, held in front of him, still wearing the #56 Washington Redskins jersey that I first saw him in.

My previous encounter with God was on Valentine’s Day when he raised quite a bit of police interest; for a while six to eight members of local law enforcement were following God.

Every 100 feet or so, as he made his way north through Court Square, he would stop and yell, “I am God!”

I commented to one of the cops on his tail … “Maybe he is?”

As my journey on Thursday took me in the same direction, I watched this procession continue for several blocks as it headed north on Main Street.

How ironic to see the police choose a location directly in front Blessed Sacrament Catholic Church to bring God to his knees.

A small, older Hispanic woman came rushing from the church and tried to intervene in what was happening to God, but the police kept her away.

What alarmed me about this was that, from my vantage point of about 50 – 75 feet away, it seemed that one of the officers had pulled his gun on God … who, while briefly loud, was consistently moving and during the time I watched the procession was in no way threatening to anyone.

When I saw God on Saturday, I asked him about having the gun drawn on him. Matter-a-factly, he told me it was no big deal … it was just a taser … which made me feel much better about the judgment exercised by our local police.

He also told me his name was Garfield and that he was not held long on Thursday … which also made me feel better about our town.

It is not for me to say whether Garfield is or is not God; but seeing him here in Harrisonburg has had an effect on me.

Assuming that Garfield is not God, if God one day does come visit us; I wonder how God would be received? Would one of the first things that God says to the police that greet him/she/it be, “Don’t Tase Me, Bro!”

Unlike the effect that a cop pulling a taser on me would have, it didn’t seem to bother Garfield, as he told me on Saturday, while tightly griping his white cross, “You can’t stop the scriptures.”

On Thursday the Magistrate made the right call in not holding Garfield. Even if he isn’t God, it is better that he’s walking around our streets tightly holding on to his cross than locked in a jail cell.